Talk to the Hand

My date from hell started on a blind date with another couple. The three of them decided that the four of us would see the movie Alien 3. I had no interest in this movie and I had never seen the other Alien movies. The four of us get our seats and are practically the only ones in the movie theater. My date tried to explain the whole premise of the Alien series to me before the movie started. Soon after the movie starts, I hear my date muttering. Not looking at him, I leaned closer to him and said, "I'm sorry, I didn't hear what you said. Can you repeat it?" He declined. About 20 minutes later, he's muttering again. I asked him to repeat it. He declines again. Ten minutes later, he mutters something again. I turned this time and asked him what he said. "Nothing," he said. "I wasn't talking to you." I looked around to see whom he was talking to. I see no one sitting around us. Ten minutes later, the muttering starts again. I turn and look at him and I see him -- for real -- talking to his hand! I couldn't believe it! This lunatic guy was talking to his hand as if it was a person! I suffered through the rest of the movie, but insisted on being driven home as soon as it was over. The hand-talking freak actually asked to see me again! What nerve! I shot him down real fast, hurried in to the safety of my parents' home and promptly took a shower to try to wipe off the creepy vibe of the evening.

--submitted by Diana